i am so angry i cannot think of a suitable title

I am going ever-so-slightly f***ing crazy attempting to wipe the cache of my CrackBerry and sync it with my Mac, so during this incredibly frustrating task which seems to be taking at least 10 times longer than it should, I thought I would peruse the newspaper online, as I'd received my latest SundayHerald update email this morning ...

Bad move. I should have known it really.

There's all the Gordon Broon/nu-Labour backstabbing news with even more Tory general election leanings and legitimacy after the incredible defeat at the Glasgow East by-election served up from the SNP. Worrisome, but not fearsome. I go to read all my usual articles, Roddy's entertaining and informative column which helps me keep tabs on Ailidh sometimes, Fiona Gibson's silly parenting antics and Tom Shields' usual buffoonery. Except this time, Shields has something quite insiduous to divulge and I can't quite believe what I am reading ...

Expect a mutiny on any bounty scheme for the unemployed

I understand why governments do this kind of thing. I know I am on a similar scheme at present, but I also know that it is actually HELPING me and encouraging me to learn, work part-time and deal with my issues so that I can eventually go back to proper full-time work, doing something I love and enjoy and feel like getting up in the morning for.

If I was having to do "community service" to earn my unemployment/sickness/disabilty benefits or whatever you want to call them, then I think I'd be back on the edge of the precipice again. I'd feel even more worthless and alone, cast-out once more by the "system" and hated by "the man" for not conforming to their ideal of how people should live in this awful consumerist, capitalist bent we seem to be STILL encouraging citizens to strive towards.

"Mr Purnell believes nobody has a right to benefits." WHAT THE FUCK?? I can't even be bothered to censor that because it makes me so incredibly angry. Every citizen of every country deserves to the right to claim benefits for when they are unable to provide for themselves. That's what being a citizen is all about, right? Contributing when one can and receiving help when one needs it? That's the point of a society? Of a community? Or humanity? If it's not, then I'm sorry, but I don't want to play. But then you all knew that really, didn't you ...

Or am I really deluded in my so-called-idealistic fantasies as to how the world should be run?

My eyes have been opened an awful lot in the past year about benefits, unemployment, illness and how it differs between countries and peoples opinions towards benefits, both good and bad. I have a shiteload more I could say about all of this, but I just give thanks that I live in a country that can support me whilst I'm not doing so well. But what beggars belief, what I truly cannot accept, is that the very place that opened my eyes to the inequalities in the world and let me vote for a Socialist alternative is now going to allow this most despicable of acts to happen, to - for the most part - people who have no alternative to help themselve; no jobs, no prospects, no encouragment and no hope. I am beyond embarrassed that I was swept up in the '97 Tory revolt and actually voted for nu-Labour. It sickens me to the pit of my stomach. I didn't think GB could do this, I thought he would say no, he's fucking SCOTTISH for christsakes, he of ALL people should know better!?!

For those of you that have never heard of it before, please read about the concept of a Citizens Income. That's a UK site, here's a link for QUT's concept of a Basic Income for Australian citizens.

I encourage all thoughts and responses, I think it's something we should all be talking an awful lot more about. It especially concerns me when I realise the amount of friends I have, who have to take mental health days or breaks or years to recover from illness or stress, and how many of them are in the arts sectors where they can't rely on pensions, profits, parents or investment properties to help them recover from such "setbacks". Myself included.

Now I have no energy to continue with figuring out this fricking annoying phone bollocks. Seems a bit irrelevant just now anyways...